Where is the time machine

When I set out to write my little blog I decided I would write about the quirky and occasionally the everyday things that happened in my life. My intended audience was my family - if they could ever be bothered to read it. So far I don't think they have been bothered but thats ok. I guess it was more for me anyway. Up until recently I have avoided being philosophical or sentimental but today I'm going to say I feel sick knowing what I have to do. Guess in part it was my own making. Something I handled badly and in hindsight should have and could have done a lot differently. At the moment I am hiding out under the blankets but I also know that this afternoon is unavoidable. PS I finally decided to come out from under the blankets and commit.  I phoned and said I would be there at 1.  I decided to have a shower and maybe even get there early.   But first I have to hang the washing out, put my clothes away, make the bed.   What am I coming to? Well while I was doing this I thought, if I was going to my doom (which I am not but it is going to be hard anyway) would I go meekly making sure that everything was in order for those left behind or would I go kicking and screaming, fighting to the last? I finally decided that if it was inevitable and that was it I would image that I would make my last moments as normal as possible. Like nothing bad was going to happen to me it was just another day and I was going about my life as per normal but if there was a chance that I could perhaps change something and alter the outcome I would be kicking and screaming all the way.